I happened to catch a little bit of a program called Dr. General today. I won't be watching it any more -- it's on early in the morning, and is not something I particularly want to see at that hour.
( Please step behind the curtain )
Now you too can suffer from every disease known to the medical profession, without even becoming a first year intern! Just watch Dr. General every day, and learn what those innocent-seeming symptoms you've had all your life really mean...

A prescription for hypochondria. Take two episodes, and visit your doctor in the morning.